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another important message

by lunageek520

pixel art another important message by lunageek520 piq
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time
2:29
date
07 September 2017 22:55
id
431713
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3434

guys, I made one of these a while ago, and this is a follow up to it.
I still am completely alone, my family doesn't seem to care, and my life is hard.
I've found myself staying up at night, thinking about everything in my life that's gone wrong. And it's a lot.
I feel completely isolated right now, which is the worst possible thing for me, and my family does not notice.
I have all this stuff in my head, and I can't get it out. I trip over my words when talking, because I have so many important thoughts in my head that it all gets jumbled together.
I can't concentrate anymore. I feel like i'm going crazy. I feel like i'm becoming depressed. I don't know what to do anymore.
I used to think life was great, that I could do anything. but now...
I don't know...

Damnata, invisus, ubique
Ab omnibus, ad infinitum:
(Damned, hated, everywhere,
by everyone, forever!)
(lyrics from city of the dead by eurielle.)



comments

[this comment was deleted by marioziehm]
by marioziehm, 07 September 2017 23:09
heh buddy listen i've been in you

situation you're in a tight spot the

only difference between us is you

still have a chance to change things

now why don't your parents seem to

care do they love you do they tell ya


so if not talk to them don't make

my mistakes trust me that will

break your mind forever take charge

talk to them walk around meet new

people and if any of them dont

wanna talk or be your friend then

there fucking loss dude you deserve

friends wanna know why you deserve

them because you a talented kind

person heh so keep going things can

only get better for you beleve me

and if im wrong then have god him

self prozent himself and slap the

fuck outta me
by marioziehm, 07 September 2017 23:10
are those song lyrics?
by lunageek520, 07 September 2017 23:15
nope
by marioziehm, 07 September 2017 23:16
my words
by marioziehm, 07 September 2017 23:16
and ya wanna know something else you also have us
by marioziehm, 07 September 2017 23:17
then why are they...
you know what?
I don't want to know.
but thanks.
that helps, i guess.
by lunageek520, 07 September 2017 23:17
and yes I do.
by lunageek520, 07 September 2017 23:18
i dont know what to say, really im like, in tears cause dude,you're awesome and i did not know all of this i mean,jeez thats worse then me, but listen dude, just,idk but just please stay cause you dont need to feel isolated and all,you got us,you got friends
by Shawsnow, 07 September 2017 23:19
i spaced them do there easy to read like it hut my eyes looking at that jumbled mess befor heh
by marioziehm, 07 September 2017 23:19
thanks shaw.
I know I have you guys, just, when I'm in school everything seems worse.
I never smile, I always feel like I look angry and i'm scaring others off.
so, thanks for that, both of you.
*hugs*
by lunageek520, 07 September 2017 23:22
I'm in the same boat. Once the feeling begins to bloom, some people find it hard to banish those negative feelings. It's hard. Trust me, I'm going through the same thing. Just know you'll always have us to help you out. Me personally, I hide my depressed nature in a mask of jokes and comedy. I can't say for sure how to let the negative feelings fade away, but I find surrounding yourself with friends and people like that, and it'll ease the pain for a while. Keep holding on, and hope it'll get better.
by WatchingEye, 07 September 2017 23:23
I get what you mean.
I am always wearing a mask.
My gas masks, and my emotional masks.
I'm not as adept as controling myself as Stonewall Jackson, but i'm pretty good.
My family sees me as a serious, focused person, but in reality, i've got all these emotions inside me.
But, you guys are making it better.
by lunageek520, 07 September 2017 23:25
heh just talk to some people and im sure someone will like you
by marioziehm, 07 September 2017 23:27
Luna, don't bottle up these feelings.

It may feel nice to let it out here but it's only temporary and it'll only make you feel worse in the end.
It may seem that your family doesn't care, but I think they do.
Usually, they don't seem to notice because you don't give them anything to notice.
I know it sounds pretty cliche but, I'm telling you this out of experience.
You have to tell them.
Let them know about these feelings your having, before any of this gets worse.
by Jo-Jo, 09 September 2017 16:55
wow...
that was unexpected.
hmm...
well. thanks.
by lunageek520, 09 September 2017 19:57
have you tried actually letting your parents know how you feel and not just pretending like nothing is wrong and waiting for them to notice


because you could seek professional and emotional advice from a liscensed therapist rather than waiting for your problems to only get worse because you don't know how to solve them, or asking people who are probably about as emotionally stable as you are because they're younger or the same age. Speaking from experience, try being more open with your family or someone who can get you into counselling with an experienced adult who can offer you a better outlet and advice. Js
by Matthias, 10 September 2017 02:15
yeah...you obviously don't know me...
I care too much about others, so I won't generaly put my worries on them.
by lunageek520, 10 September 2017 20:08
obviously, you dont care too much about them!
not to be rude, but by not letting them know for so long makes them feel like you dont trust them.
by not telling your feelings you're hurting them in the long run.
i personally believe in confiding in your family for this sort of thing rather than a therapist because youll get more emotion and heartfelt words from them than someone whos just doing their job.
if you dont resolve it now, it could turn into something very very serious.

please!!! let your family know!
by Jo-Jo, 10 September 2017 21:39
luna i am very serious.
find a good time to speak with your family, personally i preferred dusk just with my mother and i.
your mother loves you more than anyone in the entire world!
she would feel so heartbroken and useless if you never told her anything.
by Jo-Jo, 10 September 2017 21:42
yeah, I am waiting for a good chance, but I really don't want to do it with my sister around, and I haven't been able to get my parents alone...
by lunageek520, 11 September 2017 01:49
Then I guess you're going to suffer more because you choose to do nothing about it. Sorry.
by Matthias, 11 September 2017 19:56
thanks.
I think...
by lunageek520, 11 September 2017 20:11
Really? Please don't do this to him right now, Matthias. Let him choose what he wants to do. I'm just hoping my advice will help. My parents helped me at a very difficult time, we couldnt afford therapy and I'm happy regardless.
by Jo-Jo, 12 September 2017 15:03
thanks jo-jo.
and it actually made me laugh, so I don't mind.
and also, i've decided not to worrry.
if my life doesn't get better, at least I can try to make someone elses life better.
by lunageek520, 12 September 2017 15:18
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